To Tom Tomorrow

Here is a recent email I sent to Tom Tomorrow, creator of the utterly useless comic called This Modern World. It is the most partisan, liberal, one sided, unfunny piece of garbage ever published. This guy has absolutely no room for truth in his comic. Pick up a free copy of the Dallas Observer to find the latest strip. His web address: www.thismodernworld.com


Here's a few jokes.

You're so liberal...
Babs Streisand is pissed at you for taking all her thunder.
Dave Matthews is considering dumping the next tour's worth of bus waste on you.
Michael Moore is challenging you to a fart contest.
The students at Berkeley want you to teach them liberal rhetoric 101.
Rush Limbaugh thinks you are funny.
Uber Journalist Helen Thomas wants you to prepare her eulogy.

You're so partisan...
Rev. Al Sharpton is calling you up for pointers.
The 200+ swift boat vet liars are targeting you next.
You're a little unbalanced.
Scratch that last one. You are a dog chasing its tail.
You are the opposite of Derek Zoolander: you can't turn right.
Michael Moore wants you to write the forward for his next book.
But, Michael Moore wouldn't put any references to your comic into his "documentary" because he didn't want people to think it was based on conspiracy theories.

You're so unfunny...
Carrot Top is considered a genius compared to you.
The comic strip Dilbert is considered side splittingly, knee slappingly, tear jerkingly hilarious compared to you.
Bob Dole gets more laughs than you.

Your comic is so one-sided, unfunny, and pointless...
Not even a single newspaper in France wants to syndicate you.
Only trendy, drunk, dumb ass, Dallas area clubbers will get anything useful from it.
Only voters with an IQ of 1 will use the information to help them decide who to vote for.

In light of all these priceless jokes, I would very much appreciate if you would give me credit for them if you use them on your website or elsewhere, and that you pay me some money for them also. $100 per joke per usage should do it.

Thanks for creating a worthless comic strip.

Sincerely,
Kodiak
Dallas, Tx