The Prequels

Now I would like to chime in on how I feel about the prequels to The Holy Trilogy. Much has been said about the quality of these movies compared to their immortal older bretheren. I think it is safe to say that these films are just like younger brothers. The youngest, The Phantom Menace, is mostly a children's flick, with very little good dialog. Make no mistake, the quality of the visuals and sounds is phenominal, and the presentation is nothing short of amazing. After watching the film again and again, for me it just gets worse and worse. 8(
In respect to this movie, the first time I saw it in the theater remains to this day the best theatrical experience of my life. It was as if the theater was just upgraded with the most powerful, distortion-free sound system money could buy. Every person in attendance felt the deepest gut-rattling bass in the history of the cinema! From the first ship fly-by, we knew we were in for a huge treat. My Dad and I just looked at eachother with eyes a bulgin' and said "WOW!" We were mesmerized from beginning to end, leaving the theater so jazzed up that we did not come down from the high for days! Unfortunately, the power of the big screen sometimes masks the underlying truth. Compared to its immortal bretheren, this film was utter trash. Nothing more can be said about it. Some of the acting is dry as the Sahara and flat as a board. Padme Amidala is dull personified. I like Natalie Portman and think she is a good actress, but her Padme is read with such dead monotonous tones that she takes all the energy out of a scene. Other scenes, such as the onset of the sandstorm on Tatooine is met with such deadpan readings as: "This storm will slow them down." -Obi Wan Kenobi "Looks pretty bad." -Captain Panaka
I am not even going to go into the Jake Lloyd thing. There is too much animosity there. Let's just say that if Haley Joel Osment had been in that role...magic. Nothing to expect but magic. Too bad.
Also, the phrase: "Be mindful" was used far too many times. It seems Lucas has lost his ability to write clever dialog. Other additions to this film were just plain tedious. Take for example the pod race. The original version, shown only as a deleted scene on the DVD, went on for so long it could have been its own movie! That two headed announcer was the perfect example of Yin/Yang. The non-English speaking one was great. The English speaking one was so bloody annoying I wanted to wring its neck to shut it up!!!! The darned thing only seemed to know how to begin a sentence with the words "Looks like" or "I see". Once again, George has lost his touch with dialog. Little things like the many-armed alien offering food to onlookers was just stupid.
Next big thing: Jar Jar. Never before has one singular character caused so much of an uproar in the Star Wars community. His hard to understand method of speaking was so "Rastafarian" in nature it offended many. His plucky comic relief was seen as completely unfunny by most. I though he was cool, but used far too much and overstayed his welcome. He did have some really good lines, though. My personal favorite is "More...more did you spake??" One question about Jar Jar. Why on earth did he go with Qui Gon to the settlement on Tatooine looking for replacement parts? Did he have ANY VALID REASON WHATSOEVER to go along? Not only does he have trouble with the blazing sun, but the ONLY thing he does while he's there is get in the way and cause trouble. I thought Qui Gon had more sense than that. Yes, George, we know you and your ILM can create very lifelike purely digital characters, but you really went overboard with this one.

And now to the next chapter: Attack of the Clones. Now this I like. It is a definite step in the right direction for the Star Wars universe. It holds up to repeat viewings much more than its predecessor. The atmosphere of this movie is more in tune with the style of the originals. Dialog has improved somewhat. It doesn't seem as childish and dull. John Williams score really shines this time around. The themes are much more dramatic and have a sweeping epic feel. The love theme between Amidala and Skywalker is wonderful. Williams hits another home run with this one. Also, the scenes on Kamino with the rain and the dark clouds have the perfect score to compliment it. Very moody and uncertain. Hayden Christensen is good as Anakin, albeit a little inexperienced. He has the perfect look for Vader's alter ego. The preliminary pictures of him in Episode III are just sweet. He looks wicked and darkly powerful. Can you just imagine if Titanic boy had gotten this part??? Leonardo DiCaprio would have been utterly wrong for Anakin Skywalker. Thank the stars above that didn't happen! Also, Ewan McGregor looks even more like the great Obi Wan we all know and love. His banter with Skywalker on the proper way to follow orders is perfect! When Anakin asks defiantly if Obi's senses are truly that "attuned" he shoots back, almost with surprise that his padawan is treating him with such disrespect, "Possibly". This is probably my favorite line of the movie! Only a very good actor could pull this off so well. I was not so pleased with Christopher Lee's performance. Coming off the heels of some of the greatest movies of our generation, I was expecting dark, evil magic. I got no such luck. Lee's seething, superb performance as Saruman is eons better than his portrayal of Count Dooku. (Stupid name! I mean really George! A name similar to "dookie"???) His Saruman is old, but very powerful. Dooku just looks old. He is not the least bit intimidating. When the force lightning comes out of his hands, I am not afraid or impressed. The lightsaber fights with him are bad too. That face applied to the stunt double's head looks just horrible. Entirely unconvincing. Not at all worthy of ILM. Another disappointment was Sam Jackson. I like him and think he is a great actor. He was a little better in The Phantom Menace. Only a little. He gets the facial expressions right, but the reading of his lines is just too difficult to accept. Did like the purple saber, though. Nice touch. ;)
My biggest caveat was the Jedi showdown at Genosis. Just about every Jedi looked so corny and so campy. Those goofy expressions and poses. I couldn't help but laugh. George has successfully turned the Jedi into a laughing stock. No wonder they were all wiped out. Didn't much like the clone troopers either. They still don't look real enough. They still look painfully computer generated. They don't even live up to the movie's namesake. They aren't really attacking, they are merely following Yoda's orders to help the Jedi and rescue Obi Wan. Funny how the Star Wars community came up with so many good jokes about the title of the movie.

I am so excited to finally see the story complete. Episode III is most definitely going to make up for the first, and will make the second more enjoyable. If it is truly the darkest of the six movies, it will cap it all off splendidly. At least George is going in the right direction. Oh, and one more thing. YODA RULES!!!! That little firecracker can swing a saber like nobody's business. The Force is strong in this one.

p.s. How about those love scenes? Riding cow-size ticks in the field? Rolling around in the meadow? Frolicking? Intimate discussions in the firelight? Heh. Someone needs to teach George how to do that properly. I couldn't help but retch. He never would have gotten a passing grade in film school for that!

The Holy Trilogy

Although I had already written my first monthly classic movie review this month, I had failed to realize that the Star Wars trilogy, henceforth to be named The Holy Trilogy, was being released at the end of the month. This will not be a review, per se, but a discussion of my likes and dislikes of the DVD versions, including the 1997 special edition and the prequel DVD releases of The Phantom Menace and Attack of the Clones. (Next blog entry)

Like the majority of my generation, I grew up revering the Holy Trilogy as a major instrument in the shaping of my imagination. One of the defining events we all reenacted as kids was not Cowboys and Indians, it was Luke and Vader, swinging and clashing our lightsabers, shouting "I am your Father!" "NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!" Just watch that little scene in Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure with the medieval armor and you'll see what I mean. This is the reason we must bestow the name The Holy Trilogy upon it. We will never forget the feeling of awe and amazement that carried us through our early, impressionable years. It is with these memories, I pass on my caveats with said trilogy.

Now, there are definitely some good additions. The clean up of the source, and the added animations to the ship fly-bys are impressive. I'm sure that all the added celebration scenes at the end of the trilogy will feel more important once the prequels are finished. My single favorite addition is in A New Hope, when Han and Chewie are chasing a small group of Stormtroopers. They reach a dead end: this time around it is what looks like an entire garrison of Troops in a huge hangar! The crowd went wild when we saw that one!!! The look on Solo's face!! Brilliant!!

Unfortunately, the good is far outweighed by the bad. Very first on the list, and certainly one of the most notorious, is Greedo shooting first. The first sight of this change was in 1997, when many many Americans stood in line, some for the second time, to see the almighty trilogy in theaters, to experience the spectacle first hand the way it was meant to be experienced. When I saw this change, I literally laughed out loud at the absurdity of it. Han's head looked shrunken, the sound of the blasters was totally quiet and limp, and the mythos of Han's ultimate coolness was totally thrown out the window. Most fortunately, this travesty is very slightly made almost bearable, by the re-animation of Han's head to include more of his body which makes it more believeable, and the time between Han and Greedo's shots has been shortened to be more visceral, along with a louder, more pronounced blast. I think it has improved much from the 1997 change, even though it should not have been changed from the original in the first place. With that out of the way, I can include a quicker description of the subsequent bad changes.
The scene with Han and Jabba is still in, but Jabba's computer generated model and animation is much better, and it looks more like the Jabba we will meet later on. It is an unnecessary scene, because Jabba basically repeats the exact same speech that Greedo gives Han before he is blasted into oblivion. At the end of the scene, Boba Fett comes into view, and looks at the camera, completely unconvincingly, almost walking toward the audience and saying "Hey, remember me? I'm an important character!" as if we have no idea who this is. Another bad change is the inclusion of a large size blast when Chewie shoots his blaster rifle in the Princess rescue scene. Even though he is continually blasting cameras and troops and such, we only hear his gun when we are right in front of him. As large as that gun is and as powerful its blast is compared to the small blasters Han and Luke used, I think we would hear it more than just a few times. It just seemed out of place and not very well done.
Sometimes I wonder why Lucas approved some changes, seeing as how he is usually very selective and critical with his effects. I guess he is slipping in his old age.
In The Empire Strikes Back, we are treated to an extra bit of Snow monster sightings, that look rather goofy, like an actor in a suit. Personally, I like the original, which mostly hides the monster but allows us to hear its frightful screams and growls, letting us get tense and making us wish for a quick escape! Much more convincing that way, meesatinks. The single worst change in the middle movie is a quip from Luke to R2-D2. When they land on Dagobah to search for Yoda, R2 falls off of the X-wing into the mire, eventually getting swallowed by an unknown beast, only to be spit out at high velocity and sent tumbling some 30 feet away. Luke helps him up, and in the original version says "You're lucky you don't taste very good!", but in the changed version says "You were lucky to get out of there!". WHY??? Why change that line?!?!?! It was so funny! I thought this script change was completely unnecessary! Why? Why? Why?? Why George? Why? Sheesh. The big change in this edition from the earlier versions is the inclusion of Ian McDairmid's Emperor Palpatine which replaces the non McDiarmid incarnation. A welcome change, though his face looked a little odd compared to his final form in Return of the Jedi.
I can live with that change. It seems fitting. Also, in the 1997 version, as Luke allows himself to fall, choosing to die rather than join Vader, he utters a scream as he falls. This scream is the EXACT same one the Emperor utters in Return of the Jedi as he falls to his death at the hands of his most faithful servant, Darth Vader. The audacity of Lucas and company thinking this stolen scream would NOT be noticed by any observant fan is obscene. The DVD release has this scream removed, and me thanking my lucky stars of its removal. Now it is right, back to the way it should be.
The most notable change in Return of the Jedi is the abysmal "Jedi Rocks" sequence in Jabba's Palace. The original song was shorter, as the dancing chained woman is dropped into the Rancor pit. This piece of stupid trash is almost a complete musical piece that is so stupid it made me not want to acknowledge the fact that I was a Star Wars fan. No attempt is made to make the music sound even remotely interstellar, as it is complete with saxaphones and trumpets, as if it was lifted directly from a jazz club. Another absurdly laughable addition. BAH!
The final important change comes at the very end during the big celebration. Luke sees his mentors and teachers' Force projections: the ghosts of their former selves. Originally, Anakin Skywalker appeared as an old man, now it is the young Anakin Skywalker: Hayden Christensen. I believe, the idea is that Luke sees his dad the way he was before he turned to the dark side and became Darth Vader. It makes sense, but I don't like the goofy face he's projecting.

All in all, there were lots of little changes that made a difference for the most part, yet some were permanent blotches in the greatest trilogy of all time. The Holy Trilogy

Click here for a great review of the trilogy: DVD Verdict

p.s. I don't think I made this blog long enough, do you?

Quote of the month

"I actually did vote for the $87 billion before I voted against it."

- John Kerry,
on voting for funding for our Troops

More flapjacks, anyone?
Yes / No / Maybe?

A Whole New World

"I think it's time to say goodbye to Prince Abooboo!" - Jafar

Finally coming to DVD, is the Disney animation classic Aladdin.

Next Tuesday, October 5, the film gets the 2 disk special edition treatment and a digital presentation. (meaning the film was scanned into the computer and most likely cleaned up, and the audio was enhanced)

This film has been a long time coming. Why Disney took so long to release it on DVD is unknown to me. It's obvious why they would postpone it until late in the year for the holiday season, but why the long wait?

Anyway, it is a great family film and Robin Williams all out steals the show, as expected. There are great computer animated effects, such as the flying carpet, and many of the buildings; there are lots of cool musical numbers (and I don't even like musical numbers), thrilling chases and escapes, and the comedic stylings of Gilbert Gottfried, although he is a little annoying as far as Gilbert Gottfried goes. Seeing as how his whole schtick is about annoyance, his performance fits right in.

p.s. Bass alert! Make sure to crank up the bass during the opening scene with the entrance to the Genie's cave: the Lion's Head makes a spectacular bass-rumbling speech! Make your insides rattle!

Bloody thieves

I despise thieves. Low class punks who care nothing for the people they take from. They don't realize that the trouble they cause is most often to those who are in the same rut that they are in. I find out not 5 minutes ago, that one of my sisters lost another car to thieves. ANOTHER CAR!!! That's TWO CARS! At the same apartment complex!! I would not be surprised at all if it were the exact same thieves responsible for stealing and stripping the first car. My sister and her husband are very hard workers, and don't deserve to have to deal with losing TWO very important possessions required for daily life. With their first baby on the way, the repugnance of this event is made all the more cruel by the fact that these worthless thieves are taking away a much needed thing from a small family who deserve everything in the world. The saying goes bad things happen to good people. The person who coined that phrase didn't mean for it to be absolute.

My idea of punishment for this crime is, if they catch the thieves responsible, they should get a minimum of 5 years in jail, along with the purchase of a car to replace the one they stole. If they cannot afford this, they should work in prison and earn the money, with no chance of release until they repay the debt. Also, they should be put on a list of known thieves so not only can those around them know of their past crimes, but they themselves will always be reminded of the pain they cause their victims. Unfortunately, the society we live in is making it more easy to get away with crimes. One explanation: the removal of morality from school. Too many kids grow up not having to think about the consequences of their actions, so they feel no shame in doing whatever they want. How much you wanna' bet the kid who stole this car is possibly not even out of high school, looking for a quick buck, thinking they are oblivious to the law. Heaven forbid he should ever meet me in a dark alley.

Flap Jacks, anyone?

So the great flip flopper himself, John Kerry, has criticized Bush countlessly on his Pre-emptive "Invasion" of Iraq, yet a few years back, 1997, he says quite the opposite on CNN's Crossfire: "We know that Iraq is a danger to the United States, and we reserve the right to take pre-emptive action whenever we feel it's in our national interest."
Now what do you think Kerry will say to defend this statement? That he thought Iraq was a threat then, but now he didn't when the President signed the order to go to War? That he didn't say those things? That he said those things before he didn't say them? As far as I know, Saddam Hussein was dictator of Iraq before 1997 and after 1997. Either he is a threat or he isn't. So much for Kerry's "Stronger" war on terrorism. Now he seems to think that if he is elected President, all he has to do is just talk to the North Koreans to get them to stop their Nuclear Weapons production? So you think they will just bow down to him after a mere utterance from his mouth? Ha! Someone's dreaming.

Yes, then no

A Soldier's letter

My fellow blogger, Espella Humanzee, sponsors a Master Seargant in Iraq, who corresponds with him. They recently exchanged letters which were posted on his web site here and here

It is wonderful that we can know straight from the soldier's mouth what goes on in Iraq, and that we as Americans support all they do to help our country, and the people of Iraq, who want freedom just as much as we do.

God Bless and Protect our Troops.
God Bless the People of Iraq.
Thank You for Freedom.

At it again.

So here I am watching Fox News' coverage of John Kerry's remarks about the war in Iraq and the Iraqi Prime Minister's remarks made to Congress recently, and once again, Kerry has nothing more to do than criticize and whine and cry and piss and moan and not present a real agenda. He quips that America's military deserves a better leader, yet he expects the troops to support him? I am quite sure a lot of them don't even respect him, let alone want him to be their Commander In Chief. You know, it does things to the military community when you go before Congress and essentially turn your back on your fellow soldiers and undermine all they worked to accomplish. They don't forget, and these stories are passed down through military families. The brave men and women who dedicate themselves to protecting and serving their Country, essentially giving up their lives for the good of the land they love, deserve the best possible leadership and President George W. Bush has done all in his power to support those who protect their Country. Kerry has been in politics ever since he left the military and has had more than a little time to make his mark in the workings of this Country, yet after all that time, he has mainly flip flopped on many issues and has nothing substantial to support his reason to be the leader of America. Plus he has married into wealth and become all high and mighty, the perfect cantidate to represent the Democrats, the supposed party of the underpriveleged. Any reason why the majority of rich members of American Government are Democrats? I wonder...

Free for a small price

So, getting tired of dropping cash into that money-pit car of yours? Sick of that old jalopy that barely runs? Wondering if there is any hope for you? Well, your prayers are answered, it's Oprah to the rescue! Now you get a $28,500 car for free!! YES!!

But you forgot to read the fine print. Always there is fine print.

Turns out, you have to report that as income when you file your taxes, so the Government can tax you on it! That free $28,500 car could become over $7,000 in taxes!! That's much more than your beat up old junk car is worth. Isn't income tax great? The idea behind the big car giveaway was part of Oprah's "Wildest Dreams" campaign. All the winners of this new car had a family member or friend vouch for them that they had no car, were in dire need of a car, or currently have a trash bin on wheels. A free car is great, but many of us don't have even $7,000 to shell out on a new car.

Why can't there be a big gift without a catch for once?

Read the fine print...

"Look at the Birdie, Son."

STroopers2
Originally uploaded by Kodiak.

"All right, on three... 1, 2, 5!"

"Three, sir!"

"Three!"

FLASH!!!

"You Rebel SCUM!"

STrooper1
Originally uploaded by Kodiak.

"We're not playing dress-up."

These guys were smooth. They even had COMLINK apparatus in their helmets, allowing them to sound like real Stormtroopers. Some folks are just really dedicated, that's all.

The wait is over

I have it. It is mine! My greatest material possession! Last night was quite a night. I arrived at the Best Buy in Plano, Tx around 10:45. There were about 8 men in Storm Trooper outfits, most likely a group of Star Wars fans who gather at every Star Wars event for pictures and publicity. Very cool, very believeable. There were a few men dressed as Jedi, in what looked an awful lot like home made costumes, very corny, very unbelieveable. Glowing lightsabers ablaze. Lots of supressed chuckles throughout the crowd at the sight of these superfans. I will post some pictures. There were drawings for prizes, but unfortunately, yours truly didn't win anything. 8(
We all hung around until midnight for the opening of the store. There were some people who had been in line for Lord knows how long. Me, I have a life, and more important things to do than stand in a line all day. However, the line I stood in took about 40 minutes away from my life, a small price to pay for being among the first to own the greatest trilogy of all time. Since I couldn't help myself, I watched the first movie when I got home. Got to bed around 3:15 a.m. The craziest part of all is, I got to work ON TIME!!!! Sometimes I amaze even myself.
See if you can guess what I am going to do tonight...

Final Day of Waiting

It's here.
The time is now.
Midnight tonight.
Sweet bliss.
Best Buy.
Central Expressway.
Plano, Tx.
One of only 9 Best Buy locations in the U.S. to sell @ midnight.
Feel the Force flowing through you.

T minus 2 days and counting

Ten thousand? We could almost buy our own ship for that...

But who's gonna fly it, kid? You?

You bet I could, I'm not such a bad pilot myself!!

The Force is strong in this one...

T minus 3 days and counting

Luke...
Come with me...

Ben...
Why didn't you tell me???

You cannot escape your destiny...
You must face Darth Vader again...

I HAVE YOU NOW!!!!!

T minus 4 days and counting...

September 21, 2004.
Tuesday.
DVD.
Trilogy.
Special Edition.
Drool...
The Force is with us.

Dream Dream Dream

One of my dreams last night is still in my mind. Usually they disappear when I wake, or stay behind only a few minutes, then my memory of them is wiped clean. This dream was quite odd, and was in color. There was a large white slide, in the middle of a small lake. It must have been 30 feet tall. I was in the middle of it, obviously not sliding down, but merely observing. There was a platform at the top of the slide, where at least 4 old ladies stood. I recognized two of them as workers in a previous job I had. One by one, they left the platform. One of them trotted down the slide, nearly losing her footing on the side rail, toppling over, but making it safely to the ground. There were a couple more people on the ground to help her up. The other three women stepped off the side one by one, plunging into the lake. It was deep blue, and completely still. As they dropped into the water, they were in an upright position, diving in feet first. Their dives were perfect, and no one was injured. Imagine how tense it felt to see three old ladies willingly dive into a lake from thirty feet up! I don't know why I dreamed it, don't know why I recognized two of them, don't know why there was a large slide in a still, deep blue lake that old ladies were jumping from.

Strange things dreams can be.



If you have a dream you remember, post it in a comment. I would love to hear it.

A Random Observation

I feel like posting an entry. No real reason, other than to make the most of my free blog site. I thought I would just do a search for random topics, and the most entries that came up were from forum sites. There are innumerable forums on the web, one for each and every subject. There are also countless members of countless forums that post countless entries. It is not surprising to see a number of members who's post count is around 3 or 4 thousand. I can just imagine the nerds now: sitting in front of their computer all day, every day, just typing and playing games and video chatting online!
...uh...uh...hmmm...now, wait a minute...uh...what would that make me??

"A Great Disdurbance"

One week. Just a friendly reminder to any person who likes movies to go out an pick up your copy of the Star Wars trilogy, on DVD for the first time next tuesday, September 21, 2004. Prediction reminder: I predict this DVD set will be the best selling DVD on the market since the inception of the DVD format, and will continue to be a best seller for at least a few years. There's no doubt in my mind. The force is with us.

Official Site

Bridge of Clear Light

Here is the first entry in an ongoing list of my favorite music. Each entry will feature a particular song and include reasons for my fondness of it. The subject of this entry is Clara Ponty, a French pianist, and the daughter of the popular jazz violinist Jean-Luc Ponty. Clara trained from an early age to be a concert pianist, competing in and winning several contests. She has released 3 cds so far. The last song on her second album The Embrace - Bridge of Clear Light is only one of my favorites from her, which will be the subject of this first entry. When I close my eyes during this passionate and uplifting song, I float along in a stream that can only be made of clear light, as the title so aptly implies. The range of emotions varies from relaxed and content, to contemplative, even sad; yet it all comes to a happy ending, repeating the opening theme, but in a completed, finished manner that ties all the emotions of the song together, closing the album. Clara is a very talented composer, and each song has a manner all its own. Bridge of Clear Light represents her style of composing and performing, soft and flowing piano, perfect for relaxing and winding down.

Clara's Website

That Time of the Month

Not feeling so well? Hot flashes? Stomach cramps? Bad headache? Not just for women anymore. This new study reports that as many men as women suffer from the same pre-menstrual symptoms. This must be why Politicians like Al Gore, Terry McAuliffe and John Kerry are always exploding and getting crazy and defensive. Sometimes you just need a little "Me" time, you know?

Pre Men's-tral Syndrome

Dancer in the Dark

The time was 4:30 a.m. I am awakened so thoughtfully by the new neighbors, who don't seem to have the same sleep time as the rest of the city. Their computer is always the first culprit, with some program featuring a male voice, and various bleeping sound effects, all reproduced by a bass heavy speaker system; augmented by the residence' loud talking, apparently unaware that any other human being exists in the world. Two calls to the management have not stifled their early morning noisemaking, and drastic measures are nearing necessity. How darned difficult is it for people to lower their volumes during all hours of the night? How stinking hard is it to talk with a medium to low voice and not talk full force?? How inconsiderate do you have to be, for crying out loud!!! First step requires every human being to come to the realization that they are not the only existing creature on this planet. One's actions will undoubtedly affect the other living beings around you. Second step is to realize that apartment dwelling requires discretion when creating sound waves that penetrate walls and permeate the neighbor's abode. Just because you don't sleep between the hours of 3:30 a.m. and 5 a.m. doesn't mean that your neighbors don't have to. Third step is to take action and ensure that you are a good member of the community. Then there will be peace.

Sailing...

"...takes me away to wher whow whall wheys wheeveee..."

Or so Christopher Cross mumbles in his most well known hit, now playing in dentist's offices everywhere.

I went sailing Sunday night. First time! I have been in a motor boat before, and we tore up the lake, but I have not been in an old fashioned sail boat. It was quite fun. Darkness was quickly creeping upon us, the lake was all but empty, and the weather was almost perfect. Gusts of wind would give us jolts of speed and lean, a single motorboat patrol unit would occasionally give us a wake to jump over. I done had myself a good time. Funny thing happened after we got back to the dock: it rained on us! After all we did to keep dry. Actually, I kinda liked it. Did you ever see the movie What About Bob? in which Bill Murray is a complete multi-phobic person who agrees to go sailing, yet eventually they have to tie him to the mast? Luckily, I wasn't like that. Surprised even myself.

Case dismissed

I have found a great website. DVD Verdict. In the style of a court, they dissect DVDs and give great, in-depth reviews. Recent reading of their review of The Lord Of The Rings The Fellowship Of The Ring Extended Edition (whew!) gives good insight into how they conduct the review process. Here is an excerpt:

The Verdict

This one Ring rules them all. A spectacular achievement in cinema, and the best DVD package of this or any year to date. The Court orders you to buy it, linger over it, savor it, fondle it, and call it "Precious." Any case against New Line for gratuitous double-dipping is summarily dismissed. We're in recess.

Amen to that!

My Preciousssss!!

Monthly Classic Movie Review

I thought I would start a monthly movie entry to my blog. I have quite the collection of DVDs and have watched every single one of them at least twice. Movies are a very important part of my life. The list is over 300 DVDs and growing. The first of these entries belongs to one of my favorite comedies: Coming to America. Before Eddie Murphy donned a fat suit to play Sherman Klump and family, he was made up to be not only an old, foul-mouthed New York Barber, but an old Jewish man as well! That, along with a few other characters, makes for a movie makeup extravaganza! He shines as the main character: Akeem Joffer, the Prince of Zamunda, showing a kind and refined character. Arsenio Hall is the co-star, playing almost as many roles as Murphy, each one to silly perfection. His Reverend Brown is a character for the ages. The two funniest scenes are thus: at the beginning of the movie, Prince Akeem is being wed to the bride the King and Queen have chosen for him. As she begins to walk down the aisle with every eye fixed upon her, the King's servant Oha quietly steps forward, his face strait as an arrow, and breaking the silence, begins singing in a high voice: She's your Queen to be!, his face contorting with emotion; finishing his song, his face returns to its strait arrow state as if nothing happened. The second favorite scene is toward the end of the movie. The Prince and the woman he truly desires to marry, are pushed away from eachother and an argument takes place at her father's home. As the film cuts between the different parties associated in the argument, the father's dog sweeps her head left and right, following right along with it. After a funny quip from the Queen to the King, the dog looks to the audience, in perfect Oliver Hardy fashion. One of the best uses of an animal in film, in my humble opinion.
Aside from one scene of gratuitous nudity, and a plethora of obscene language, this movie is a touching, warm, very funny comedy that will always be funny, no matter how many times you watch it. Delight as you watch a young Louie Anderson, working in a fast food restaurant, fantasize his rise to assistant management, and the "big bucks" that come with it. Observe with wonder the way the make-up allows for Eddie Murphy to create many characters that are completely believable. Watch as the most powerful voice in Hollywood history - James Earl Jones - becomes not only the exalted ruler of the land of Zamunda, but the master of all he surveys. I for one wouldn't argue with him on that! There are so many great characters in this movie. You are bound to like at least one of them! As Eddie Murphy as Saul, the elderly Jewish man says(complete with Jewish accent): Aha! Aha!

The Dream Team

TheDreamTeam
Originally uploaded by Kodiak.

Everyone has a dream. There are many items that we dream of owning in our lifetime. This happens to be the Computer system of choice for guys like me. Apple is the only way to go, and monetary reasons are the only thing keeping me from owning one. The top of the line G5 is just too nice. Along with the top of the line Apple display, the massive 30" flat screen High Definition monitor, which requires a special video card just to fill every pixel! Audio would be handled by a Klipsch surround system, and the Pro Media Ultra 5.1 is their flagship. The desk is made by Anthro, a professional office furniture maker. It would be two tier, adding an upper shelf not pictured here. Finally, a Wacom tablet is essential. It not only helps with creative programs like Photoshop, but eases wrist pain associated with too much mouse usage.
The beauty part of this dream system, is that it is not entirely unattainable. Granted, there is no way I could afford it in my current financial status, but somewhere down the line it could be mine. No, it will be! As Wayne Campbell says: "It will be mine, oh yes, it will be mine!"

More Malicious Michael Moore Magniloquence

I wonder the reaction, if the same situation were to happen in Saddam Hussein's Iraq, had Michael Moore created a "documentary" painting Hussein as a vacationing idiot while his troops slaughtered innocent civilians. I have one question for Michael Moore. How long would Hussein have let you live before he tortured you and finally killed you for having said something bad about him? In case Moore didn't realize, Saddam Hussein's regime would cut out the tongue of anyone who said negative things about him, would have caned him, thrown him off a two story building, which in Moore's case, would have most likely killed him. Anyone who believes that Iraq was peaceful and a good place for children to live before we invaded it needs their heads examined. Saddam Hussein was a vicious dictator who didn't allow any negativity about his regime. I do believe all that torture footage plastered all over the news happened before we invaded.

Notice how drunk on success Moore is. I bet he wants to roll in piles of the money he made from his lie of a documentary. Now he is using Senator McCain's referral to Moore's movie during the Republican convention to get more interest in his crapumentary.
I bet Saddam would thank him if he were to be allowed to view the movie. While we are on the subject of conspiracy theorists, I have one of my own. Saddam must have paid Michael Moore off, to place the blame for the atrocities in Iraq on Bush instead of Hussein. Moore is in Hussein's pocket. Yeah, that's the ticket!

Drunk on his ill-gotten success